…my unwavering hope.

The establishment of this site is merely a vague attempt to compose myself. -Rach

Wisdom. Waiting. Faith

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Three words. Three excruciating words. I don’t think it is within human capacity to acquire, execute and maintain these three words. I am learning them the hard way.

“The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot” Ps. 16:5

7 years ago, I waited for God to place me in my ‘lot’ – a school and a part-time job to sustain myself. I waited with anticipation and eagerness to what the outcome of my applications may be. After 7 months of waiting, He answered. I remembered writing a testimony about it on social media so that other people may know God’s faithfulness and goodness. It was a moment I will never forget. God told me to wait. I waited. He showed up.

7 years later, after finishing my program, getting my degree, passing my exams, acquiring my credentials and working under two employers, God calls me to wait again – to wait on His next step for me, beyond the career. As much as I would like to say that to wait this time around is a piece of cake, it is absolutely not. To be honest, my current waiting period is on a completely different level. This time, it required careful wisdom and audacious faith. For example, compared to 7 years ago, my current waiting period has no clear-cut timeline. I await no particular applications of any sort. God placed me in a room with hardly any idea on what I should expect and where I should go. Every ounce of curiosity – to browse other job opportunities, seek higher learning, commit to another program cycle – all came back with a wise revelation of STOP and WAIT. All red and yellow, no green. I bargained with God over and over again. But wisdom keeps coming back to guide me. My sense of purpose and fulfillment is challenged. Most significantly, my faith is challenged, and I weep in this waiting room because I have no clue how long this will be.

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I really wish I can say when my testimony blog will come out. But at this moment, I have no other choice but to continue to look to God as He guides me through these three words: Wisdom. Waiting. Faith.

 

 

 

 

Written by rachious

April 24, 2016 at 7:57 pm

Posted in Personal

“Don’t let your life pass you by. Weep not for the memories.”

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Those lyrics kept coming back to me. I’ve been running a routine like a hamster in a wheel. Browsing through all my phone pictures helped bring me back in perspective. I am not my job. I am someone’s daughter, sister, girlfriend, co-worker, friend, and many other things. I just have to keep myself in check. (Otherwise you might find me in a mental hospital.)

Written by rachious

January 18, 2014 at 10:24 pm

Posted in Personal

No rush.

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I have to take my time on this. To weigh both sides, be sensitive to each circumstance and quietly wait on the Lord’s leading.

“…And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” Esther sent this reply, “Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my attendants will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.” (Esther 4:14, 16 NIV)

I am torn in equal halves.

Written by rachious

October 13, 2013 at 11:49 am

Posted in Personal

More Grace

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What would you do if someone you love tells you that he/she does not feel the same way anymore?

 

This is such a hard place to be in right now, especially if you think this happened out of inevitable circumstances. Love is a choice. It is a commitment. Feelings can only stay for a period of time, but only those who truly know how to love will last forever. I’d like to believe this is just a temporary phase, and I strongly hope it is.

 

What can I do? As if I can force that person to suddenly change his feelings back to the way it was. People aren’t programmed robots. Can I love him the same way regardless of how it looks on his side?

 

I just need more grace. More grace to extend to him. There is nothing more firm to hang on to but God’s Word. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Cor. 13:7) If I don’t demonstrate this, I am not a true Christian.

 

Just a little bit more grace each day, Lord. This is not about me or him. It’s about letting You shine and be glorified.

Written by rachious

July 1, 2013 at 5:33 am

Posted in Personal

Good job.

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It’s amazing how two words lift the whole burden. In any new career, there’s that goal to exceed expectations and deliver like the pros do. It builds pressure and causes inner doubt. But at the end of the day, when everything has passed, to hear the boss say those words meant the whole world.

It’s important to look at this perspective towards our invisible race, the race God has marked for us. In this life, there’s fear, guilt, doubt, complacency, ignorance, and a whole lot more obstacles. They cloud your eyes from the finish line. It even comes to a point where you feel the race isn’t worth running at all. But when you get there, the pain it took to finish suddenly disappears at the sight of the Lord. To be told, “well done”, is already a reward in itself. I cannot wait for that day!

Written by rachious

February 13, 2013 at 6:52 pm

Posted in Personal

Because of Vincent Van Gogh, this post is born.

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If only people from history were able to travel to the future and see how they great they will become, that would be such a remarkable moment. The people who we now revere or look up to were once nobodies with a hope. Some start with a passion. Some do dream big but did not fully grasp (or simply fail to believe) the possible reality of inspiring many. One thing is certain: everyone starts small.

I have a sensitive side for specific people. Vincent was one of them. Someone who has been misunderstood, underestimated, looked down on by society – obviously had no idea who he’ll be to everyone in the future. Thank you Doctor Who for tugging my heartstrings even more. That look on his face when he saw how all his work – the work that used to hang around his house, not attractive to any buyer – is now highly revered. The way he was described as the best painter of all time.

“They did not listen, they did not know how. Perhaps they’ll listen now.” The little hope that he had, all ceased with suicide.

Heart-wrenching, but outside the secular world, there is a higher, beyond earthly perspective. There are real people who gave their lives to obey God, to bring the Gospel to the ends of the earth and to run the spiritual race that has been set before them. “These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised…” (Hebrews 11:39) They did not live to see their efforts pay off; that’s how it is so that “…only together with us would they be made perfect.” (v.40)

We are history-makers, and though we may not possibly live long enough to see the result, we can trust that we are part of God’s big picture: a picture of a promise that only a God like Him can fulfill.

Written by rachious

February 7, 2013 at 8:46 pm

Posted in Personal

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“Then Moses said, ‘Now show me your glory.'” (Exodus 33:18)

To say this to the God of all creation shows the existence of an intimate relationship with Him. Absolutely astounding, reading the extent to which Moses has seen God with his own eyes! No one has seen God’s face and lived. But God chose to grant his request by letting His “goodness to pass” as Moses anticipates on a rock.

To me, this is one of the most breathtaking, quiet, personal parts of the Bible. There’s no one else in the scene. Just him and God, communicating “face to face, as a man speaks with his friend.” (Exodus 33:11). Thanks to the blood of Jesus Christ, we can all come to God and talk to Him, knowing that He has made a way for all of us to have a personal relationship with Him. Nothing beats that kind of eternal privilege. Have you accepted His invitation yet?

Written by rachious

January 19, 2013 at 10:06 am

Posted in Personal